My Current Life Analogy...

So, I put it all together today. My life, in it's entirety at this current moment, could be explained like this analogy--

Like when the spry, golden, prepubescent high school cross-country boy with the bouncing shag-ish hair, perfectly upright posture and the teeny flowing shorts that proudly boast the crest of the university which he will attend with a full ride (for- yep- running) just pops on the jogging trail and begins his all-day run at the precise time I'm passing the trail break. I happen to be right in the middle of my 3rd mile, trucking along at a pace that can partially be described as the result of my looming insomnia and partly due to my post pot-of-coffee crash.

This pisses me off for two reasons. First, I was feeling quite comfortable, actually seeking refuge, in my mediocricy as a runner at this moment. I felt pretty good about the fact I had laced up the sneaks and physically made it down to the trail. I didn't think I had the energy to push harder, nor did I care. I was enjoying the anonymity in the trail of average runners today. And then he showed up. Which leads me to the second reason I was mad. That I could not just let him pass me, maybe even lag back a little and really let him gain the lead. At which point, I could continue on at my haggard old lady pace. But no. I could not. I allowed this boy, this record-breaking running genius-boy to force me to crawl out of my skin, out of my comfort zone to be a faster, stronger, healthier version of myself. I could not just choose to be left in the dust of his gazelle like strides. He had a death grip of control over me.

So, I ran faster. I got madder. He hypnotized me. He held on to this power over me. I pushed harder. I began to feel the hot morning sun and the dust rising from below my weary feet. I kept my eye on this one. Getting madder that I could not let it go. I did not let him get too far ahead of me. (Mind you, he was warming up and I was full on R-U-N-N-I-N-G) I did not even turn back before my scheduled run was over. Of course I thought about it over and over at first.

But before I knew it, I found myself getting distracted from myself, from my indifference to accomplishment. I began to appreciate my 'Best Run Ever' playlist. I began to feel the strength in my legs and even the payoff from my insane 'boot camp' workout from last night. I started noticing the hummingbirds and the butterflies, for God's sake! And before I knew it, the Golden Boy and I were interrupted by my ipod telling me I had "400 meters to go".. Those four words are usually when I literally throw up my fist in an Arsenio Hall-like fashion and thank the good Lord I had made it. But today, it was bittersweet. I'm not gonna lie, I was grateful I had made it (and kinda appreciative I didn't have more time)... but I was also so ready to take on more.

It was that initial digging down deep inside to the core of me to find my motivation and inspiration (well, I guess he just kinda showed up today) to be better, get better, work harder. And then to feel that unexpected growth, success, and, in a small way, pride that I was able to do what I thought not possible today. Even if that was keeping up with Mr. High School Senior's warm- up miles.

And even more ironically life-lessonesque.... Another wave of accomplishment came when I heard him say "Nice run" as I turned for home.